Jousting

I'm not even going to mention that it is Rachel's birthday. I am too excited for Anish's birthday tomorrow. Actually I am excited for Festivus. I am going to gather 'round the pole, air grievances, and compete in the feats of strength as my fore-bearers have done for dozens of years. Yay.

Between 780–1180, the Byzantine Empire and the Abbasid & Fatimid caliphates in the regions of Iraq,Palestine, Syria, Anatolia and Southern Italy fought a series of wars for supremacy in the Eastern Mediterranean. After a period of indecisive and slow border warfare, a string of almost unbroken Byzantine victories in the late 10th and early 11th centuries allowed three Byzantine Emperors, namely Nikephoros II Phocas, John I Tzimiskes and finally Basil II to recapture territory lost to theMuslim conquests in the 7th century Byzantine-Arab Wars under the failing Heraclian Dynasty.^[5]

Consequently large parts of Syria,^[5] including its capital city of Damascus, were taken by the Byzantines, even if only for a few years, with a new theme of Syria integrated into the expanding empire. In addition to the natural gains of land, and wealth and manpower received from these victories, the Byzantines also inflicted a psychological defeat on their opponents by recapturing territory deemed holy and important to Christendom, in particular the city of Antioch—allowing Byzantium to hold two of Christendoms' five Patriarchs. ^[6]

Froot Loops

A few pieces of business to attend to (note the discursive structure)...

 1. Be sure to check out MyLifeIsWawen if you want to laugh at Wawen things and contribute to this burgeoning phenomenon.

2. Comment (I'm sure everyone can figure out how.... Rachel) to suggest a new poll. What would like to know about the readers of this blog?

3. I am still accepting poems for the poetry contest, if any of you wordsmiths want to send one in.

4. Buy a shirt!!! They are awesome. Soon there will be another post that refers to shirtbuyers only, and you want to be in it. Some people who already have them are wearing their shirts tomorrow, so feel free to get in on that.

5. I like origami.

More Poems- Yay!

Here is a good one from Charles :

Me Gustan Las Legumbres

There are many things I want to do.

Among those many things is you.

For you are are an attractive female.

There are many things that I do know.

Among those many things is Joe.

Blute.

He's a pretty cool guy, I guess.  He has huge forearms.

Like, really huge.  But not in a bad way. 

you reckon he's gay?

he's in that "fairy actors association" or whatever it's called, right?

DWIGHT.

Dwight D. Eisenhower.  Let this be a lesson to y'alls.

Never use Icy-Hot on your balls.

And another submission:

Tangible Tangerines

I cannot feel my face

As the acid has rightly justified

Pain surrounds the surroundings that are surrounded by....squirrels

Oh yes, the squirrels of the century

We shall kneel before our new overlords

Before...before it is too late.

- X

The Shirt Post

So now all of my wonderful friends who purchased a shirt today will be mentioned in this post, in a wonderful little story I've devised. Everyone will be mentioned and no one who didn't buy one will be referenced, which means I can't talk about myself (I will anyway though) and Patty gets mentioned twice (this counts as one).

 I was frying some bacon when suddenly Pat McManus ordered his army of ginger bread men to assault me, lead by the ferocious general Gogarts. To defend myself, I called up Bek, but she was studying statistics with Nick Nap. I had no choice but to flee to the Cardiello Cave. However, I was quickly evicted by the evil-doer Steve, who convinced me to try eating the army. As much I accomplished successfully.

 Having successfully avoided one threat I hit up my girl Fran, only to learn she was being tormented by Becky's violin music/ webdip tactics. I thought best not to intervene. Instead Jane and I got some pizza and discussed how Jimmy Fallon is following me on twitter (he really is!). While we were out we saw James and Amanda playing chess, or plotting to take over the world. One of the two. So I said goodbye to Jane and met up with Simone who took me to BK and I ate a lot of chicken fries even though I already had pizza. It was a good day. Patty texted me "hello" and I didn't respond because I am too cool. Simone had some sort of pie/grammar emergency and had to leave early, so I caught ride back to mi casa on Catherine Dempsey's scooter. That was fun. When I walked into my observatory I noticed Nick and it looked like he just asked Sarah to the prom, and she had that look on her face like when Crespo mentions Nick's beard, so it was awkward and I left.

During the postprandial stroll I ran into Mr. D'Amico who was congratulating Pat for getting into the University of Chicago, Boston College, and Notre Dame. That was crazy stuff, like my new wildberry toothpaste.

Shirts will be sold all week (or for as long as supplies last) so don't miss your chance to be in the blog!

Flipsides

Man, I don't even want to talk about this weekend because it was too crazy, and I wasn't there for any of it because I am Warren. But my friend Pat was at the epicenter of an awesome earthquake so if you want to hear a good story talk to him.

"I read that on Warren's Blog" t-shirts go on sale tomorrow! That will be cool. So if you want to be dressed well, look for one of the people wearing a shirt as they probably also vend them. I am so excited. Oh, and everyone who buys a shirt gets a special, interesting mention on the blog. That must be a real incentive for those of you who are too boring to get mentioned regularly.

I wish I could say more clever things to entertain you all, but it is classified. We should hang out sometime so that you can see for yourself what Warren is like on the weekends. Plus then you would be an accomplice.